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Susan Harley's avatar

Lovely to hear some of your experiences Camilla and insights from this momentous workshop. I know about the trickster energies that are also needed now in all its forms and names.

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Susan, yes—the trickster energy is essential right now.

Not chaos for its own sake, but sacred disruption. The energy that loosens what’s rigid, exposes what’s false, and restores aliveness where things have gone stale.

Thank you for naming that current🔥🙏

Leah Rampy's avatar

I’m so glad you shared this. It feels like you were immersed in wisdom, curiosity, and community. What a rich journey. Grateful for your gifts regardless of how they are named. 💕

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Yes, exactly that immersion—being inside wisdom, curiosity, and a living circle where something real could emerge. The naming of my original medicine came out of that aliveness.

I’m deeply grateful for your seeing, Leah, and for the way you honor the gifts without needing to fix them in place. That kind of spaciousness is part of what makes reweaving possible. 💕

Leah Rampy's avatar

Having never met in person, I feel like we're weaving a collaboration across the miles. And I am very grateful for that.

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Me too, Leah. Grateful for our connection, and looking forward to our Substack Live and discussing your book, Earth and Soul: Reconnecting Amid Climate Chaos🔥🙏🐦‍🔥

Deborah Gregory's avatar

Wow! What a beautiful, powerful unfolding! Thank you so much Camilla, for sharing your FUNENJOY story with us. I love, love, love how your medicine revealed itself through laughter and fire, and how the whole circle rose to meet it.

"The Living Flame" and "The Hot Chocolates" land so deeply for me right now ... especially this week ... and like Danielle, there’s so much in the Heyoka path I recognise in myself too. I can already feel how this new naming will carry you forward. 🙏💖

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

You are such a kind and generous reader, Deborah. Thank you so much for your presence here in the community of this Substack! I’m really grateful for the way you listen with your whole body, not just your mind. That kind of witnessing is part of the medicine too.

It means a lot to feel met in this way, especially around laughter, fire, and that mischievous Heyoka thread that tells the truth sideways and keeps things alive. Naming it felt like striking a match; feeling the circle rise to meet it felt like confirmation. 🔥

Lulu Belle UK's avatar

That was very interesting, thank you for sharing. Your story resonates with me on a few levels, for my own soul purpose is about helping others to understand the concept and to explore their own. Additionally I have been told I may be a Heyoka (I had never heard of the term prior to this - I was told it meant sacred clown), but having your post I now see there is much more to it and to variations on this, which are well worth exploring for myself. Thank you.

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Thanks, Lulu. I love how you’re holding this as an inquiry rather than a label—that feels important. These patterns show up differently for each of us, and if this opened a door for you to explore your own soul purpose more deeply, then I’m glad it found you.

Lulu Belle UK's avatar

Thank you. Well actually my soul purpose is about helping others to realise their own. ❤️

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

That makes so much sense, Lulu—and it comes through in how you’re engaging with this.

Helping others realize their own soul purpose isn’t about leading from the front or naming it for them; it’s about creating the conditions where recognition can arise. That’s quiet, powerful work. The kind that doesn’t announce itself loudly, but changes people anyway.

I’m really glad this opened something for you. Keep following the curiosity—it knows where it’s going. ❤️

All Tabs Open/Bridget LeRoy's avatar

Love it! And it reminded me of the ‘70s band Hot Chocolate, whose biggest hit, “You Sexy Thing” started with the inexplicable line: “I believe in milk cows…”

It did not. The word was “miracles,” as I discovered whilst singing it, loudly and lustily, in front of some friends.

Maybe I could be your co-chair of the Koshare Society?

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Bridget, this is too funny! We ended the class with a dance party blasting “You Sexy Thing” 😂

Also, we played Beast of Burden by Rolling Stones and a new friend said her friend used to sing, “I’ll never leave your pizza burning.” 🤣

As for co-chair of the Koshare Society… this feels less like an appointment and more like a recognition😁 Welcome aboard. 🐄✨🔥

Danielle ⛈️'s avatar

Dear Camilla,

This piece glowed for me. The Hot Chocolates made me smile, and The Living Flame felt like a spark landing exactly where it needed to. I recognized myself in the Heyoka threads you named -- the layered perception, the paradox, the way truth sometimes arrives all at once like weather rolling in.

Your exploration of the Koshare opened something too -- that Sacred sideways humor, the way they keep the ritual alive by refusing to let it calcify. It felt like being reminded that the Sacred breathes best when it's allowed to laugh. I love finding the humor in things - it is a reminder not to let things get too serious.

And I'm so looking forward to A Balanced Earth as it continues to take shape. Your writing feels like sitting near a hearth -- warm, alive, and quietly transformative. Thank you for sharing your medicine so generously. It's a gift to witness. XO

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Danielle, I love this: "...the Sacred breathes best when it's allowed to laugh." YES! Humor as the antidote to rigidity, not a distraction from reverence.

I love that image of sitting near a hearth; that’s exactly the kind of warmth and quiet transformation I hope the work offers. I’m deeply grateful for your witnessing, and for the very generous way you reflect the medicine back with such clarity. Thank you🔥🙏🐦‍🔥

Susan J Tweit's avatar

Congratulations on finding your new version of your inner medicine, and on bringing it forth with humor (and chocolate!). Your descriptions of Heyoka and Koshare were illuminating, and your realization of your medicine coming from the living flame resonated. May your living flame burn steadily and with bright intention. Blessings!

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Thank you, Susan♥️🙏 That means a lot coming from you. What I’m learning is that the flame isn’t about force or spectacle—it’s about warmth, clarity, and the courage to burn away what is false while illuminating what’s already true. Humor (and chocolate) help keep it human, and embracing FUNENJOY🥰 I’m grateful for your witnessing and blessings, and blessings bouncing back to you too.

Susan J Tweit's avatar

So well said! "It's about warmth, clarity, and the courage to burn away what is false while Illuminating what's already true." And of course, humor and chocolate! Without which life is so much less fun and joyful. :)

Prajna O'Hara's avatar

Living flame with a good dose of chocolate

Perfect landing

The retreat sounds delicious. And the laughter is the most essential ingredient.

❤️‍🔥

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Prajna, I love that; living flame with chocolate. That feels exactly right. 🔥

And yes, the laughter was everything. It softened the edges, melted the intensity, made the whole thing human and holy at the same time. Without laughter a retreat can become earnest, but with it, it becomes alive.

Grateful you felt the landing🔥🙏

Donna McArthur's avatar

It's very interesting to learn about the Koshare as I'd never heard of them until I read your excellent essay. It brought to mind our modern day comedians such as Kimmel and Colbert who use humour to shine light on the holes in our cultural and political structure. These are important roles in our society. Well done figuring this out about yourself Camilla!

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Donna, I love that connection—my husband loves watching Colbert, Kimmel, and Seth Myers nightly and I enjoy it with him sometimes too.

Humor really is one of the safest ways to speak dangerous truths. The Koshare weren’t just entertainers; they were cultural correctives. By exaggerating the cracks, they helped the community see itself more clearly.

At its best, comedy doesn’t just mock—it illuminates.

I’m glad the essay opened that doorway for you. And yes… I’m still learning what it means to carry that flame without taking myself too seriously🥰🔥🙏

Donna McArthur's avatar

I agree wholeheartedly and love the term cultural correctives.

Michael Edward's avatar

A truly FUNENJOY post, Camilla. I enjoyed the levity as much as I did learning about the Kóshare. Thank you for sharing the Hot Chocolates with us :)

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Michael, that makes me smile.

And yes, the Kóshare feel like permission slips — for irreverence, for joy, for poking at what’s too tight. I’m glad the levity came through. Sometimes laughter is the most honest teacher in the room.

And yes… the Hot Chocolates were too good to keep to myself🔥🙏

Michael Edward's avatar

“Sometimes laughter is the most honest teacher in the room” — I couldn’t agree more. That’s why I’m always so funny…. Hehehe :)

Julie Schmidt's avatar

I love this Camilla. What a wonderful retreat, sounds nourishing and transformative all at the same time. Appreciated the exploration into both Heyoka and Koshare, the trickster energy fascinates me, I'm sure I have a bit in me as well. And I love that you landed on the living flame. That which generates warmth, is the creative spark and is a passionate force... and can bring big transformation.

And the chocolate metaphor was right on. Food metaphors work really well. Put fire and chocolate together you get hot chocolate! Or cacao. I did a cacoa ceremony a year ago! Powerful - the fire and chocolate.

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Julie, thank you 💛 It really was both nourishing and transformative—one of those spaces where things can soften and sharpen at the same time. I love how you name the trickster as something many of us carry; and yes, it feels less like an ego identity and more like an energy that keeps life from hardening.

And yes to fire and chocolate—hot chocolate, cacao, ceremony, warmth that opens the heart and stirs creativity. I’m grateful for the way you’re walking the liminal and for your reflections🔥🙏

Shellie Enteen's avatar

I'm glad you didn't land on Heyoka. I've had some Lakota teachers and the idea of this wasn't as warm and engaging as you are. 😉✨🌀✨

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

I appreciate that, Shellie. From what I've read about Heyoka, it didn’t feel like something to claim so much as something to learn from and brush up against. I understand that in the Lakota culture, Heyoka carries a gravity and rigor that deserves respect, not casual adoption.

What emerged for me was warmer, more relational—laughter and fire as invitations, not shock. I’m grateful for your discernment here, and for naming that difference clearly. ✨

Stephanie Raffelock's avatar

Here's to one of the "sweetest" women I know, and I love that you are now a chocolate. A fitting term.

What a great gift to give yourself, this time of looking inward, pondering and growing. Deep admiration for you, Camilla. May you continue onward with your own special kind of grace.

Camilla Sanderson's avatar

Stephanie, thank you 🥰 That means more than I can say, especially coming from you.

And yes, I have a sense that this is one of the best gifts I've ever given to myself. I highly recommend both Gail's class, and the Modern Elder Academy.

And yes, a little chocolate always helps😎

I’m grateful for your witnessing and for the grace you model so beautifully, Stephanie. Sending love and sweetness right back to you🔥🙏